Live! With Kelly and Michael

Thursday, November 26th, 2015

>> It's "live with kelly and michael." Today from "the middle" actress patricia heaton and one of the stars of "scream queens," keke mpalmer. And chef marcus samuelsson heats things up in the kitchen all next on "live"!

[Captioning made possible by disney-abc domestic television]

>> Now, here are emmy winners, kelly ripa and michael strahan!


Kelly: Hi. Hi.


Kelly: Hi. Listen. Listen up. It's thursday! We're almost there. Welcome to the show. Good-looking crowd. Everybody. Right?

Michael: Yes.

Kelly: Just in case you're wondering, we're really close again, did you notice that? Patty's sitting on that lady's lap. Sometimes our desk moves forward and we don't know how it gets there but looks like there's a whole dance floor right behind us.

Michael: Looks like we got robbed.

Kelly: Maybe they forgot we were doing the show today.

>> That's today?

Kelly: Mm-hmm.

Michael: So how was your night last night?

Kelly: Great. Watched "kingdom" and I'm the only person watching that because it's directtv. But mark made his debut last night.

Michael: Really?

Kelly: Yes. My husband is working on this show. It's just so good. You know? I just can't talk about it enough.

Michael: Did he have any m.m.a. Fight scenes?

Kelly: Well, there's a scene at the end where he and this lead character get drunk and get into the cage. But they are interrupted by nick jonas.

Michael: Really? Did he have to take his shirt off?

Kelly: Disappointingly, not yet. Mark was unfortunately clothed. Everybody else is naked in the show and my husband is walking around in a suit. I said to him, what's with the clothes?

Michael: But the nudety is coming?

Kelly: Yes that is coming up.

Michael: Everybody is saying what?

Kelly: Everybody sundayly runs out and gets a satellite dish.

Michael: I like the show. Very well done and I love that whole m.m.a. World.

Kelly: But it's a show about family. I love it. I love having like my wednesday night routine. That's my wednesday night routine.

Michael: Last night I was out with my peeps.

Kelly: Your peeps?

Michael: Yes. I was out in new jersey.

Kelly: The guarden state? Did they ask for me?

Michael: I was doing a book signing and everybody was like, where's kelly? I'm like I'm only married to her an hour a day.

Kelly: I keep her in the brief case.

Michael: But I love doing the autograph signing for my book and I want to thank everyone because book made the "new york times" best seller list.

Kelly: First week?

Michael: Yes.

Kelly: That's your debut week.

Michael: And I want to be thank all the 400-500 people throughout last night and everybody who bought the book, thank you, thank you, thank you, so much. I can't say enough about it.



Kelly: Dreams come true.

Michael: Dreams come true.

Kelly: That's the title of your second "new york times" best seller.

Michael: "wake-up happy" and the next book will be called "go to bed mad."


Kelly: People don't think about when you pay for things and you hand your money to the person behind the counterwhat goes on in their mind, maybe the -- personal stuff they are going through when you take your cash out of your drawers and lot of women like to keep the cash in their bra and a lot of men like keep their money not in their pocket but in their drawers.

Michael: I never once -- I see a lot of things.

Kelly: We are from a different generation. That's all I'm going to say. I'm not going to name names but there are a lot of people whose parents are on this staff, and I'm not going to name any names, gelman but keep their money not in their purse.

Michael: Where do you keep your money, gelman?

Gelman: Not me.

Michael: You shouldn't be going under your pants, that just seems wrong on all fronts. Now, I've seen the old breast plate but I've just never seen a man.

Kelly: It happens.

Michael: Or a woman.

Kelly: And the cash is raufpbley. It's sweaty. My committees hate it, and I don't like it says -- it's an australian cafe. So we can still do it here in america. But in australia the owner of a cafe is saying please, if you keep your cash in your underwear or your bra, please don't bother to come into the restaurant, because he does not want his employees to have to deal with your sweaty wads of cash. So in case you're planing a trip to australia, buy a wallet.


Kelly: I went to australia and I kept my money in a purse.

Michael: Well, I guess people go to the gym. Still, you have little pockets on your jacket. I always try to wear something if I have to carry cash, where it's away from my pody.

Kelly: When I go for a run in the park I'll put cash in my sock and then my key in my pantsd sometimes I'm going for an endurance run, I can feel the key as it starts slithering down meh pant leg, and it's kind of satisfying in a way, because I feel like --


Kelly: I'm moving, you know what I mean? I'm going for it. I'm making that key slide down a lycra leg but it's also a creepy feeling -- no. Not my phone. I don't take my phony.

Michael: When I was a football player I used to keep my money in my jock strap. No.

Kelly: I have no locker room.

Michael: Well, now they make all these cool little pockets in the pants. Sometimes they make the pocket in the back and I can't reach it.

Kelly: And the feeling of the pocket rubbing --

Michael: Then when you put too much stuff in there you got a little bump on your booty and people like what's wrong with you? You and our friend neil patrick harris hosted the oscars and this year, chris rock.


Kelly: He is fantastic.

Michael: This is his second time. He's hosted. Back in 2005 and a 10-year break and he is really one of the funniest, smartest comedians out there and knows how the throw a joke at you but you can laugh at yourself in a lot of ways, because it's very hard that night because everybody is so up tight but he knows how the loosen a room and a master and genius comedian. So congratulations chris rock.

Kelly: He is also -- he is also one of the smartest comedians ever in history. So he is a thinker. Like he puts together a tight program. He is like a scientist about it. I just love him. I think the world of him. So I look forward to that.

Michael: Yes, we'll see him at the oscars.

Kelly: You ever check your fantasy football league while you're in a meeting with gelman?

Michael: I don't play fantasy football but I check everything else while in a meeting with gelman.

Kelly: Because they are saying 8 0-plus percent of people check their fantasy teams while in a face-to-face meeting with their boss.

Michael: I can see that because it's so competitive. And now they have these different games that people --

Kelly: You can earn money. But now aren't they saying that they are stopping that?

Michael: I don't know how they are going to stop it. Some places, nevada has banned it. Because nevada -- they are like, we are the only ones who make money off of gambling. I don't know how it isn't gambling but there's a fine line but a lot of people are up in arms because there was a controversy because someone worked for one of the sites and made money on the other site and felt like they could have had information not available to everyone. And I love to commercial the guy I nut $35 and have won over $2 million.

Kelly: If you win money, it is the most exciting thing. I think I told you this. Christine got me scratchoff lotto tickets because I, every year for christmas, I buy all the producers here scratchoff lotto tickets. It just makes us all laugh that maybe we'll hit the big payday and we'll just leave this popcicle stand, gelman. So she bought me a whole bunch of scratchoff lotto tickets. And I'm telling you it's the most fun you can have with your children, and I won $8. And you would have thought that I won $80 million. I was, like, football, kids! I don't need life anymore! Wall keen is like, where are you doing? It's not nearly enough. I'm like, it is enough.

Michael: But you give everybody a ticket. Maybe we'll find out if somebody does win millions and they say adios, the other producers are going to be, like, I hate you.

Kelly: Well there's a contract that dictates whatever they win beyond $10 goes to me. So it's a win-win for all of us.

Michael: That's the way to do it. We always talk about a lot of people working hard. But there's a lady who puts everybody's work ethic to shame. She works six days a week, 11 hours a day and she is 100 years old. Yes.


Filamino rotundo.

Kelly: Where does she work?

Michael: At a dry cleaners at the college laundry shop. A dry cleaning store. 11 hours a day, six days a week. And she said 75 would be a respectable age to retire if health were a contributing factor but obviously she is healthy because she is 25 years past that.

Kelly: Why not? If you like what you do.

Michael: And I think interaction with people keeps you going. I got some catching up to do.

Kelly: Yes, you do. You think you are a harder?

Michael: Slacking. All this week art moore is a hard worker.

Kelly: Extraordinary.


By the way. I've got to tell you. You never heard this come out of my mouth but art and I worked really hard yesterday. We really did. It was creatively taxing. I still have makeup on that I can't get off because it's not coming off.

Michael: Honestly when we do all the makeup for these halloween things I wonder how people who wear makeup.

Kelly: I woke up this morning and mark said, are you bleeding? And I woke up and there was red on my plofment I'm not going to say why. You're going to have to figure it out but I washed my face then worked out then showered and washed my face then washed my face before bed and I woke up this morning and there was still makeup on the plofment that's gross. That means it's coming out of somewhere.


Kelly: Like, oh, no.

Michael: All this week our chefs have been taking the live superstar chef challenge and have been building a meal around one star ingredient and art has been running around the city handing out the assignments and today it was chef marcus samuelsson's turn. So let's take a look.

Marcus: All right.

>> What is this?

Marcus: It's my ingredient is sweet potato. Kelly and michael, you're going to love what I'm going to do with this.


Michael: Yeah.

Kelly: Whatever marcus is cooking, I'm eating, because that is one great chef.

Michael: One of the best guys too. A really great guy. So everybody, let's kick this party off with our pop quiz trivia.


Kelly: Hey. Oh, my gosh! All the way from san mateo, california is keeley reynolds. California girl.

Michael: Chili, that was great.

>> Thank you. All right. Let's say hello to christine schumm from cotton woods heights, utah. Hi kelly.

Kelly: Hey christine. Let's spin the wheel and see what you're playing for, ok?

>> Ok.


Kelly: Hey, you're playing for a great prize, the club in par bay dose. It feels exclusive, doesn't it? Seven days and six nights. Ooh, listen to this, in an ocean-front room. Don't you want to be ocean front in par bay dose? All inclusive. Gelman, does that mean?

>> Everything. Well, almost.

Kelly: I think he means you can't take the furniture, but everything else is yours. This trip provided in part by and a prize valued at $ -- good luck.

Michael: Today's subject is physical ed. On yesterday's show we talked with michael j. Fox. In what sport the kids michael say he was bad at?

>> Golfing.

Michael: You got it.

>> Congratulations you and a guest will enjoy seven days and six nights at the club barbados resort and spa. It offers a waterfront setting. Guests can be as active or relaxed as they please with water sports, tennis, a fitness center, fresh water swimming pools, your prize is valued at approximately $8,300.

Kelly: Hey christine, congratulations.

>> Thank you so.

Kelly: Now you get to help make the day of a lucky member of our studio audience who will receive a $500 gift certificate from zap's. So pick a number between one and 235.

>> 41.

Michael: 41?


All right, christine. Congratulations. There you are, young lady. I think she is supposed to be at work, because she is like, I can't stand up. Patricia heaton will be here.

>> Start your morning in the key of "live." Perfect harmony.

Kelly: We should sing a duewet. I mean, people are clamoring for it. We all know and love our first guest for her funny performances on "everybody loves raymond" now on abc's show "the middle" please welcome back to the show, patricia heaton!


Patricia: Thank you. Hi, guys.

Kelly: I turned to michael and said patricia always has the best clothes. And you once again proved me correct.

Patricia: Thank you. Well, if you've seen me on "the middle," you would like to get dressed up. I think I had a pair of plaid bermuda shorts and there was a wide shot and I turned to my husband and I said oh, my god don't ever let me wear those again. I look three feet tall and four feet wide.

Michael: You look amazing though.

Patricia: Thank you.

Michael: You have had a very successful career. You won two emmys for "everybody loves raymond."

Kelly: And you always make a hit.

Patricia: I had one little failure between the two shows.

Kelly: We don't even recall.

Patricia: But it's amazing that I'm here at this juncture. I mean, I've been doing this since I was little. Like the minute I came out of the womb I was, like, look at me. And I would drag all the neighborhood girls to the garage and we would put on a play and I would say I just lead the book and we're going to act it out so I have been doing it for a really long time just personally. It's nice to be able to get paid for it. So I've been kind of an exthrow verrett/nars cyst all my life.

Michael: But a lot of people in the business have been doing it all your life. There were some struggles but when did you know you made it?

Patricia: Well there was a time I couldn't get arrested. I modeled for shoes.

Kelly: And you have very pufe feet.

Patricia: They are my favorite part of my poddy, my feet, because I get to wear all these fun thingses. I ran a xerox machine and proofread at morgan stanley so, when I finally got to hollywood and finally got my first sitcom with linda lavin called "room for two" and I drive to the warner bros. Lot and still driving my 1974 toyota corolla that I bought from rent a wreck for $1,500 and I didn't have $1,500 so I put it on a credit card and it had a faulty starter so I would drive it on to the lot and they had valet and they would say we'd love to bring your car to you but we can't get it started that's when I said I think it's time for me to buy a new car because I am on a show and I can afford a car so that's when I first knew I could make it.

Michael: So you took rent a wreck and turned it into buy a wreck.

Patricia: Yes. I sold it for $300 and as the guy was driving down the street, it broke down and stopped. He still took it.

Michael: No returns. We have to take a quick break but when we come back we're going to hear about your walk on the wild side. Right back with patricia heaton, everybody.

>> Do you know someone who goes out of their way for others? If someone you know deserves to be recognized for thought full behavior, the self-less person "live's" winner will walk away with $10,000 and a $10,000 will also be made to their favorite charity. They will also get a one-year supply of gum. Go to kelly and or our facebook page on twitter. Be sure to provide the name of the person and submitted in less than 200 characterize. If you think someone's self-less act of kind necessary deserves to be recognized, go to #live ok.

Patricia: Ok. Wait until you see what eden and I made.

>> What?

Patricia: We made some eyeball ice cubes for the punch. Look how cute. It's got your eyeball and eyelashes and it's pineapple juice in here.

Kelly: I want to make that.


That's from patricia heaton's new food network show. It's you having parties.

Patricia: Me having cocktail parties. You forgot the most important word.

Kelly: I don't make a distinction. Party means cocktail party.

Patricia: When I first got married I loved playing wife and was doing a lot of dinner parties for friends. And my mom had never really -- everything in my house was made with ground meat. Meat loaf and spaghetti with meat sauceso I kind of had to teach myself and because of all those struggling years I was a waitress and managing restaurants. I was a room service waitress here from 6:00 a.m. Until noon. And by the way when you answer your door for your waiter at a hotel, put some clothes on, please? I have seen a number of celebrities in their underpants.

Kelly: And what do they look like?

Patricia: Let me just say. Now I call this guy john cougar underpants.

Michael: Maybe that was your kid, I don't know. You get the -- and yeah.

Kelly: Here's what I want to know, how do we get invited to one of your parties? You watch the show. I'm happy to come to anybody's party who wants to cook for me. I try to do this when I have a high ate us the week. I'm still working long hours but now that the boys are kind of out of the house. Well, they are supposed to be out of the house. They are still living there. But now I can get back to the parties I used to do and my vision for people is don't be intimidated by thinking you have to do a three or five-course plated thing. Make a couple different appetizers and specialty cocktails and have them come into the kitchen and help you with it.

Michael: It's a participation thing and it's a party.


"Party with patricia heaton," everybody.

>> Start your morning in the key of "live." ♪

>> Wild. Don't miss a beat.

Michael: This is not a rock concert but we love you too.

>> Mornings on kelly and michael.

Kelly: We should sing a duet. I mean, people are clamoring for it.


Michael: Yo. Our next guest is a very successful actress/singer and broadway star. Please welcome the multitalented keke palmer.


Keke: Thank you. How are y'all?

Kelly: You need wear this dress every single day of your life.

Keke: Thank you. You make me feel good. I love your skirt.

Kelly: Thank you. Would you like to be touched by the madonna hand?

Michael: I love your show. And the name keke just makes me happy.

Keke: My actual name is lauren and I know you're wondering well my sister really loved dolls and when I was about to be born she had her favorite doll and it was named keke and she said mom and dad can we name the baby keke? And my parents named me lauren and they said that's not a name she can live her life with. But --

Kelly: I love it because it's a sparkley name and you're a sparkley girl.

Keke: Thank you. Well it started into the industry it was barbershop 2 and a casting director gave me my first shot because I had never auditioned for anything before. Living in chicago just beginning my acting career. A thache wouldn't at first give me an audition so I appreciate her for giving me my first chance. Then my real big break would have to be akilla ma dee which was an amazing script and doug atchison. Just a very special story.

Kelly: And it holds up forever. It's great.

Michael: So you have had so much success at such an early age. Was there anyone who reached out to you and gave you advice to help you out?

Keke: I have been blessed to have many people send me encouraging words. Queen la tiffa has been a huge, huge part of my career since the very beginning. "barbershop 2" I did with her so we did a lot together so we have a long history. And I also had different runins with different people. I never really tell this one story but I tell it now. When I was about 15 I was going through a lot because I was doing "true jackson" a show I did for nickelodeon and I was really started to get stressed out because this is so weird and I'm working all the time and I was speaking with my attorney about this and literally a week later will smith called me and gave me some encouraging words. I was, like, first of all, I answered my phone and I was, like, hello? Hey, this is will. I'm like will!


Uncle phil, will?


It was the coolest thing. On my 16th birthday he and marlon -- a couple people sent me encouraging videos and so I have been really blessed to have a lot of people reach tout me throughout my career.

Kelly: I love queen la tiffa. My favorite. She is the most positive person on the planet. Great lady. I love it.

Michael: Next we are going to talk to you about running for president. We are going to talk to keke about running for president. Stay right there.

>> Start your morning in the key of "live." Mornings on kelly and michael. Perfect harmony.

Kelly: We should sing a duet. I mean, people are clamoring for it.

>> This fall season "live" is entering another dimension. It's time for "live's" blastoff travel trivia. You could soon find yourself jetting away on the vacation of a lifetime. Log on to kelly and or our facebook page. Send us your name, address, date of birth, photo and send it to

>> My mom is mostly tout picture too. I was raised by my grandma who told me if I really, really applied myself I could grow up and get out of cleveland and become the first black woman president.


Kelly: On "scream queens." It's a ryan murphy tv series and he has magic when it comes to that.

Kelly: I fell in love with ryan murphy during the first episode of "american horror story." It was scary. My sister used to tell me about "nip tuck" and I thought this dude. I want to work with him one day. I never thought it would necessarily happen. Literally on vacation and agent calls me ryan is doing a new show called "scream queens" and he is inquiring about you for a role. I about dropped to the floor. This isn't a prank! So then we met up and I was all in from the jump. It's about girls in a vorte house and there's murders that start to occur and the whole show is kind of like a game of clue. You go through each episode and you're learning more and more about the episodes and you're trying to figure out who and why even us as the cast are trying to figure out what's happening because you're going through the pages am I alive still? Am I alive still? You may or may not be!



Kelly: I'm so excited for you.

Michael: You can come back here anytime you want. You are so much fun. Keke palmer, everybody!

>> Start your morning in the key of "live." Wild. Fresh. Fun. Don't miss a beat.

Michael: This is not a rock concert but we love you too.

>> Kelly and michael. Perfect harmony.

Kelly: We should sang duet. I mean people are clamoring for it. ♪


Kelly: He cooked for the president, you guys.

>> I cooked for you.

Marcus: I cooked for you.

Kelly: Royalty! The youngest chef to ever get a three-star review by the new york times. Today he is taking on "live's" superstar chef challenge. Please welcome back to our show, the gorgeous, the talented, chef marcus samuelsson.


Michael: Now, we saw art moore came and visited you and brought you your fall ingredient which was the sweet potato.

Kelly: Sweet potato doesn't get its respect, does it?

Marcus: No. First of all, I know you like saove jan blanc. We have a reason to celebrate. "new york times" best seller!



Michael: Thank you.

Kelly: We want to go to number one. We like a challenge. I'm going to drink and you guys

Marcus: Put in in there, boom! This is a challenge. Garlic. A little bit of salt.

Kelly: I love salt.

Michael: Let me boom that too. Boom. Pop! But this sweet potato marv is actually going to be chunky. So we are going to put a little bit of these beans. Chop it up.

Kelly: I have excellent knife skills.

Michael: But you have been drinking -- be careful that's a sharp knife.

Kelly: Ow! Kidding.

Marcus: Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

Michael: A little aggressive.

Kelly: Apparently.

Marcus: All right. All right. Got it.

Kelly: Some of us have been drinking before the show.

Marcus: Absolutely. So we got the beans, the sweet potatoes in there.

Kelly: You want me to put these in there?

Marcus: Yes. And in the magic of television we got our sweet potatoes right here. Michael, you are the strongest guy here. You don't want my muscle doing this compared to your muscle.

Kelly: Excuse me, I'm the strongest guy here.

Marcus: There you go.

Michael: I like to mash things.

Kelly: What about all this butter? It's just sitting here. We like butter.

Marcus: We are going to add this in here. A little bit of sweet poe tate, garlic, onions. And this. Comes from my home country of ethiopia. It's berbery.

Kelly: That smells good. Amazing. That's an amazing smell.

Marcus: You did a good job.

Michael: I'm available to help somebody in the kitchen. And people are so confused about the difference between a yes, ma'am and a sweet potato.

Kelly: Why can't people figure it out!

Marcus: From south of the equator is yaments and sweet potatoes even if they call them yes, ma'ams but they are both delicious. Here's a yes, ma'am. 90 cents. Organ I think. It's a big difference in the store. Let's taste it up.

Michael: Plate!

Kelly: I'm going to let that burn over there.

Marcus: Let's go ladies first, all right?

Michael: Of course.

Marcus: Then I got one of your favorite. A little bit of caro salad.

Kelly: Did you put a swedish meatball in here? Get out!

Marcus: Uh hug.

Michael: Well, you know what? Thank you, so much chef marcus samuelsson. And everybody, all this stuff is on our website. The recipe to cook the sweet potatoes or yams, whatever you want to call them. We'll be right back, everybody.

>> Think our show town watch from home, join us. When you're in our studio audience you never know what's going to happen. You could even become part of the show. Just go to our website for tickets. What are you waiting for? Come join the fun. ♪

Kelly: Chris from orlando, florida says telly, -- kelly, why do you always look in the confetti cannon before you swing it? I don't know.

Michael: She does?

Kelly: One time I fired a blank and I didn't like way that made me feel so to make sure of it.

Michael: Most people don't. Most people don't like the way that makes them feel, kelly. Janell wagner from virginia.

Kelly: Sure. Powhatan? My 6-year-old protect his pinky finger and decided to call it his strahan finger. There you

[ Cheering and applause ]

Here she is now, ellen degeneres.

Appreciate it. Great to see you, everybody. Thanks so much. Thanks for applauding for me when I walked out. If you're not from l.a., you should know it's customary to applaud whenever you see someone walk.

[ Laughter ]

I was in new york last week and -- well, we all were, the show was there. It was a lot of fun. Everyone walks there so that's what I did. I walked all over the streets. I don't want to brag but I'm an amazing street walker, y'all. So the first night we were there porsche and I were walking to dinner. There are 8 million people in new york city, not one of those people asked me for an autograph. Instead 8 million people asked me for a selfie. It's out of control. I took so many selfies, by law, I'm now an

Built Thursday, November 26th, 2015 10:02am